spiritual neurosurgery

"For weeks, for months, I had been fighting to control my temper, figuring I could handle it myself.  Now, in that small, hot bathroom, I knew the truth.  I could not handle my temper alone ... Already heavy into psychology (I had been reading Psychology Today for a year), I knew that temper was a personality trait.  Standard thinking in the field pointed out the difficulty, if not the impossibility of modifying personality traits. Even today, some experts believe that the best we can do is accept our limitations and adjust to them.

Tears streamed between my fingers. "Lord, despite what the experts tell me, you can change me. You have to take this temper from me.  If you don't, I'll never be free from it. I'll do things a lot worse than trying to stab one of my best friends. You can free me forever from this destructive personality trait." 

Ben Carson, M.D. (with Cecil Murphey), Gifted Hands, Chapter 6

Read this in class today with the kids.  A neurosurgeon talking about changing our mental wiring! Thoughts:

1)  I had students predict what would happen to someone who tried to stab his friend: "jail, insane asylum, suicide, depression, reform school."  Actual result: surrender/dependence, change, freedom.  What a beautiful illustration of grace - and how radically foreign it is to our minds & culture..

2) We can't change ourselves.  Dr. Ben Carson, one of the most brilliant minds of our time, knows this is true - experientially, psychologically, spiritually. 

3)  There is hope that we'll never again have to fear what we're capable of.  "If you don't, I'll never be free from it.  I'll do things a lot worse.."  We know ourselves best, and at some level are ashamed of our negative potential.  But we are already in part - and someday fully - rescued from this worry.